Disease and Death

The Depth of Suffering
The Desire to Die.

For a long time, death and disease were (I say "were" because somehow for the moment it seems no longer so "acute") a very real theme in my life. Both my parents had died as I still was very small, not together in some sudden tragic accident, but both within a span of only 3 years, in hospitals from different diseases.

What is disease, and why does it, sometimes, lead to death?

"Hacerte feliz es lo más importante."
If I can lilve well without someone, this means I no longer need anybody,
then is that what as a feeling remains, probably LOVE.

Over many years I always intensevely studied various religions and philosophies, as well as both traditional and holistic approaches toward "healing". Partially I put my art aside, in part this tragic theme of "disease" kept me paralyzed.

In the beginning of 1999, after a period of very intense work, during which I spent weeks developing a data-base for medicinal herbs, I realized through a kind of insight that perhaps for years I desperately, unconsciously had been seeking for that "magic herb" which might have saved my parents. And in spite of the vast quantity of herbs that exist, it became clear to me: they did not die because of "medical neglect", or "missing cures"- but simply because they wanted to go.

This realization impacted me deeply. On one hand I was sad; on the other, happy. Because it showed me that the most important aspect of life: our free will. How much our life is in our onwn hands.

For this reason "WILL" is a very central theme of my art: The decision, the color, the line.

A painting as the purest expression of my will.